Saturday, July 23, 2011

...for my sister...



sometimes our blogs are our therapy.

most of the time i like to have fun with nature...
NOT MUCH is more exciting to me than wandering around...
in the yard...in the woods...and finding interesting things to take pictures of.

well...although i always have a vast number of pic's to go through
and decide which ones to post...
today is more of a deep thought day.

the first thing i did this morning...before i even got my coffee...
was to light a memorial candle for my sister.
sally was 3 years younger than me. 
she passed away after losing a long battle to breast cancer
she had a mastectomy, went through all the usual treatments...
chemo & radiation...only to find out five years later 
that her cancer was not only back, but had metastasized.

she passed away in march of  '07.

today she would have been 54.

she had ONE bumper sticker on her car...it read 
"No Wimps"

her favorite quote was
"Gratitude is the best attitude"

and so...i always seem to get a little 'down' when birthdays or days of death
roll around.  and for me...that's fairly often...having lost both parents 
and my only sister & brother.  
of course there have been many other deaths of relatives and friends...
over the years...but it's really only my sister, brother & dad 
that get to me the most.
it's only for them that i light a candle.
it's only for them, that i get a little down.
 
when i'm in the store...buying a birthday card for someone...
and notice the cards for brothers and sisters...
i stand there...trying to keep from crying...tears welling up in my eyes...
heart-ache to the max.
 
anyway...enough of all that. 
i wasn't planning on doing a post until tomorrow morning,
but decided to do a quick one today...for sally.  
to help me.  to make me feel better. 
i needed to talk.
for the most part...
people don't want to hear me go on about 'missing them'.  
i should be over it by now,  you know.
so, here i am. 
knowing you don't have to read if you don't want.
you don't have to listen.
but it makes ME feel better to write.
 
sally loved flowers.
so these are for her!
and you.

~rain lily~


~lantana~


~butterfly weed~


What sets sisters apart from brothers
and also from friends
is a very intimate meshing of
heart, soul and the mystical cords of memory.


~mimosa ground cover~

 ~tropical  sage~


~hydrangea~


Chance made us Sisters,
hearts made us friends.


~beauty berry~


~standing cypress~


~black eyed susan~


Sisters are blossoms
in the garden of life.

 
~pansies~


~dogwood tree~ 


~redbud tree~


~persian silk/mimosa tree~


 thanks for staying...



I give you this one thought to keep -

I am with you still - I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow,

I am the diamond glints on snow,

I am the sunlight on ripened grain,

I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you awaken in the morning hush,
I am the swift, uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circled flight.

I am the soft stars that shine at night.

Do not think of me as gone -
I am with you still - in each new dawn.

(NATIVE AMERICAN PRAYER)


have a safe journey!

:]  laura





24 comments:

  1. i would never expect someone to 'get over it' in regards to the death of a sibling. it's one thing to 'expect' the death of an elderly parent or relative. quite another to have a sibling cut away from your heart. and probably worse yet, to lose a child...

    i'm glad you posted for sally today. her light is still shining in this world through you.

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  2. Anniversaries for deaths are hard. They're a reminder that there is hole where that person used to be. That's a tough thing to get over. Take the time you need to miss your sister. Life will pick up its rhythm again and time will march forward. I think slowing down for reflection is a good thing. So few of us do that anymore.

    I loved the flowers especially the mimosas.

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  3. This is so beautiful, Laura! The flowers, your heartfelt words and those of the Native American prayer. I am so glad you shared this sadness and the lovely memories you have of Sally. It's a lovely way to keep her memory alive and you are entitled to grieve for her as often as you want. There is no such thing as "should be over it by now!" You were clearly very close and it's completely understandable and natural that you miss her, especially at times such as this, when you should have been able to celebrate her 54th birthday with her. Sending you loving hugs! XOXO

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  4. Laura, how beautiful the flowers are for your sister...you don't quit missing them,or get over them-EVER! You just deal, and you ARE dealing! My brother also passed away in March 2007. I was sad all that week this year. I didn't think I would be, but I was. And on his birthday, July 4, I didn't think I would cry...but I did. He was 18 months younger than I. Your memories are fond-keep lighting those candles. I still sing "Davy Crockett" on my brother's birthday. A heart-warming post!

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  5. sending love to you Laura......what a tough day for you.........xx

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  6. Thank you Laura for sharing... now we too can be part of her memory with you and care with you and miss her with you.

    Each of your other Friends have written beautiful words, I would not be able to express better.

    While reading the Native American Prayer, I felt I could feel Sally moving through every word, creating images of her joy in my mind... Happy 54th Birthday Sally.

    You are beautiful Laura,
    I am privileged.
    With love and appreciation from Magda in Australia

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  7. Beautiful pictures, which really encapsulate your depth of feeling and your love for your sister. A fitting memorial.

    Love to you x

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  8. The flowers you've chosen for Sally are just beautiful. A loving tribute.

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  9. A hug to you -- a beautiful testimony to your sister.

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  10. These flowers for Sally and us are simply stunning....I too know the heart ache of missing a lost sister. My sister was 7 years older than me and she died when I was almost 12....so I had very little time with Oriana.....but she is very often in my day to day thoughts, even still today......my mother left us in 08 and so now she is with my sister and sadly my father passed on in Dec of 2000....life isn't always fair, but when we let our memories live, and sometimes we just have to shout them out from the roof tops....it's good to keep things alive around us....and hearing about Sally has been sweet, and not a bother.....I bet she'd really love these flowers too!

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  11. thank you so very much...to each of you who stopped by...especially to you who took the time to leave such healing, compassionate & supportive words...you really have no idea how you have uplifted me!

    thank you for understanding...relating...for being here!

    big HUG to all...who have been here...and who may still drop by...

    laura :]

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  12. She sounds like an amazing sister. I love her favorite quote! And the flower pics are beautiful :-)

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  13. (((((((hugs)))))))))
    And I'm not even a hugger!

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  14. That is sadness, I feel for you.

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  15. I believe that grief enriches the soul. Not as much as joy does, and in a different way, but it still does.
    Happy birthday, Sally.

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  16. Do you have a library nearby? If so, check out the books by Elizabeth Kubler Ross. I find her to be very comforting to read when I'm dealing with loss. She had quite a mission on this earth and she did it perfectly!
    Love and Blessings!
    meggs.xx

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  17. This post moved me to tears. I don't know how immediate death feels but I know how the death of great-grandparents, grandma, grand-aunts, distant cousins, etc feel and it pained me. So from a young adult that's been to a multitude of funerals as a child, I feel for you. I want to pray for you and I want you to know, you have family in NY! We lift you to our good LORD and want you to know you are very loved. In the seen and unseen world. May those thoughts comfort you! GOD Bless you. Today and always.

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  18. By the way, your lantana photo with the little creature on it is fabulous! Great colors!

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  19. What a lovely tribute to your sister. You have some great memories of her that you will always keep with you. Lovely words, poem and photos. Have a great day! ;)

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  20. A 'deep thought' day. So deep with blossoming love that is ever-changing unlike your gorgeous flowers locked in a perfect moment. I am 'grateful for your memorial attitude'.

    We need these 'lighted' memories, the savoring of life's nectars, the sensing of the precious--as Sally was to you.

    Very grateful you shared Sally with us.

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  21. Beautiful flowers for a dear sister. I wish you peace. I love her favorite quote as well.

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  22. I would have like your sister...:)JP

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  23. Thank you for your blog. Thoughtful, calming, reflective, inspiring & beautiful are the first things that come to mind.

    I don't know why, but last night I cried for the first time in a long time, thinking about my grandmother & how much I miss her. Although my parents are still around, since my grandmothers passing, the entire family has become estranged. No one is in contact with anyone.

    The loss of my grandmother was profound & it has been about three years now.

    To read that your parents, sister & brother are no longer here & that you have a site like this & are thriving ( at least a bit ) is why inspiring & beautiful came to mind.

    Thank you for remembering & honoring your parents, brother& sister.

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  24. again...thanks everybody for all your caring thoughts...and comments!! i appreciate it A LOT!! :)

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